I know this feeling well, and reading your post just gives me more strength to find another direction and something more from life. I know that in time, things will work out. Thanks for this great post, and for reminding me that there is always a better way...
Oh Marina...I know this has been a hard decision to make but I think you have the right idea. If it doesn't feel right, you won't be happy and it won't be worth it in the end. I hope you go where your heart tells you to go. You are the only one that can make that decision. Sweet hugs to you, my friend! I'll pray about your situation!
It's not just that. The thing is that I have been doing things I don't really like for a very long time. I did it because I had obligations, kids, family, etc. Now, when kids are grown and (as they put it) can provide for themselves, I can at least try to do what I am passionate about. Thanks Diane, for your kind comment. :)
Marina, you are so brave. I really admire you for choosing happiness and thank you for sharing this obviously tough time in your life with us. You wrote with wonderful honesty xxx
I am glad you were able to follow you feeling and change your mind, your path. It is not such an easy thing to do. It also sounds like your children are very wise and grown up - perhaps they have learned a thing or two from you. :-)
Dear Marina, this is a very brave and good decision. The most difficult to take. Thank you for sharing this personal post with all of us. I am at a crucial moment of my professional life too and I find very difficult to see where I am going. Ciao and good luck!
Hi Rita, I've had those feelings for quite some time, but didn't know what they were. I didn't go deep inside to search because I had family to feed, and my main goal was "to provide". Everything else was beyond my emotional "reach" and I was not very happy. Thank you for your comment and your kind wishes! :) Good luck to you too.
This is a good message. You're done. Fine words Marilyn. As they say in Russia: "All that is not done, all the better."... Lenusik ♥ ♥ ♥ With love ♥ ♥ ♥ Velvetrose
There is a lesson in your story, Marina, for many people today. I, too, struggled with a work decision, listened to my heart and left behind a good job that was no longer a good fit for me. Wishing you all the best.
Thanks Jean! I think that having a job that no longer feels right for you is like wearing a very tight shoes: there is a breaking point when it's better to walk with your bare feet...
Marina - this post and what you went through is profound on so many levels. So happy that you are back in a comfortable place of inner peace and that you didn't allow yourself to just 'press on' with a situation that was clearly going to eat you alive. I have been there; making a decision and then having to un-decide it. And big ones - like buying a house in Phoenix, moving there, and 2 weeks after closing on it - hating it. And moving back to San Diego within 9 mos. They were the longest 9 mos of my life. I have been there - and good for you that you are back so soon!
Hi Averie, you are absolutely right about the situation. The reason I made such quick decision was simply because of housing, believe it or not. If I didn't have to sign a six months lease, I most likely would be still there, really "pressed on" ... I am glad it happened the way it happened. Last night I read an interesting phrase: "Only you can make yourself happy,... and it's never too late to find out how to do it" (Not Becoming My Mother, Ruth Reichl) Powerful words, and we do need this to be often reminded indeed.
Hi Marina - it takes a lot of courage to do something like that. When one is very young with no family or responsibilities one can afford to be a lot more relaxed about such things so I can understand why you felt so upset. You have to try and do what you can to make yours happy in life - you only get one shot after all! :)
Hi Charles, oh I know what you mean. I've been in those responsibilities shoes for so-so many years: kids growing up, husband going to school, etc. We had periods of time when I was the only provider for the family, and I was scared even to think about changes , or about what I want or how I feel. It wasn't easy this time, but as you said "we only get one shot after all!" Thanks!
Oh Marina, I'm sorry you had to go through that, but I think you made the best decision. And kudos to you for raising such smart kids!! Sometimes I think things like that are easier for them to see, when we just complicate matters. Hugs!!
What a remarkable story and one we could all take guidance from. I'm sorry you went through so much to get to a point where you could listen to that inner voice that always knows the right answer. Thanks heaps for sharing your experience and best of luck with whatever comes your way.
Maureen, sometimes we have to go all the way to understand that we made a mistake: that's a lesson I've learned. As I said to one of my friends, to understand it was a mistake, I had to make it. Thanks for your comment!
Yes, you certainly did make the right decision, Marina. Simply put, you could not have worked there. And just look at how caring and supportive your family is! You were brave to leave that job and again to come here and write about it. Thank you for sharing, for we can all learn something from your experience.
Hi John, that experience brought me closer to my kids indeed. And what a wise people they become! I was teaching them, and didn't expect them to tech me. And they did teach me a lesson here!
Congrats Marina for such a brave decision. I am soooo proud of you :-D And I also think that you're the lucky one having such a supportive family. All the best Marina :-)
Sometimes the best decisions are the hardest, but when we make them they feel so good! Good on you for doing this! Ultimately you will be happier and you deserve that!
Thank you Jess. That is absolutely right, it was hard, really hard, but I have no regrets. And as long as I don't feel guilty about it, it feels good. :)
Marina, I know what I you talking about. I used to work in office for 7 years, then I was at home with my kids and family, and I know I wouldn't be happy if I go back. My husband love me at home and my kids also. You are strong women, you made good decision! Some people work all life, the are doing something they don't like , and at the end what you have? Regrets! Please, enjoy your life and your family and everything you can. Do what you love and you see many open doors! Good luck to you my dear friend!
You know, I am learning actually how to be a full time mother, although my kids are grown up... I wish I made such decision earlier, to spend more time with them. Thank you for your support and warm wishes! :)
Awe honey I am so sorry you went through this. And so happy your kids helped out. I had one of these moments on our vacation. It continued when I got home. I think sometimes the body just has to tell you something is wrong. You are a strong woman with an amazing family. I bet they are super proud of you. xx
What an experience. So sorry you had to go through that, but what great kids you have! So glad you decided to follow your heart. Work becomes drudgery if you're not happy doing it. Sounds to me like you made absolutely the right decision. Congrats!
Marina, I am so glad you listened to your heart and got yourself out of what would probably become an unhappy working situation! Things will line up and remember MM's good advice! Take care.
Thank you Pam. If I stayed I would be on strong pills by now, I think. Forcing yourself into things that don't feel right is withdrawing yourself from the joy of life.
Marina, Most people in this world get road bumps. I relate my life with you, when we came to Canada 12 years ago.My husband went to study upgrade his veterinary education in US and I was with my daughter working, taking care living alone. No relatives.It was so hard to leave my daughter in the day care every day before work. You should be glad that your kids are grown up, at least you do not have to worry about them. Any way, You took the right decision for you and your family.
Hi Balvinder, oh dear, I do know that road too very well. For many years I didn't even think off how I feel. I just kept going because I had to provide. That is a tough path, and many of us walk it at some point.
I am glad that you followed your heart...at the end...the only person that you have to answer is to yourself...if you are not happy, no one around you will be. You have a lovely family that support you...I am very happy for you. Have a great week Marina!
Lovely, moving post, Marina. I am sure you have made the right decision. So many of us carry on with lives like robots, without thinking if this is what we want.
Thanks Jackie. You know you dressed in words my very own thoughts. Although, I didn't talk about it to my children, I cried to them. I think I scared them with my emotions. However, they were the first to tell me to make my own choice, not based on responsibility, ration, but my feelings. I was always an outsider from the herd, adventurous and to some degree fearless person. And look what happened to me? I've forced myself into this rational and responsible person to the point, that even my body couldn't take it anymore. I have no regrets about what I did or didn't do. It was time to make a change, to believe and embrace the new journey.
I know the feeling Marina and I know the relief after making the right decision for you! I've been there and made such decisions. Your son being still a kid and not an adult trying to do "what's right" gave you a very clear perspective. Life indeed is too short and if we have the luxury to decide things that will make us happy then by all means we should go ahead and do them. I so happy for you and I am sure now that you passed through this you will keep going in this happy road!
Thank you Katerina for such wonderful comment. It was an amazing to discover what my kids have become and how quick! One day you see your kids playing in the sand, and the next day they are grown and give you a very mature advise. That was the most powerful moment for me.
Good for you - it takes real guts to change your mind and admit something isn't right for you any more. Now you're free to find something that is!
ReplyDeleteThanks Katy. I am ready to embrace the new journey...
DeleteI know this feeling well, and reading your post just gives me more strength to find another direction and something more from life. I know that in time, things will work out. Thanks for this great post, and for reminding me that there is always a better way...
ReplyDeleteLast night I was reading a book that had a very nice thought: "Only you can make yourself happy..." Perfect timing!
DeleteThanks for your comment!
Oh Marina...I know this has been a hard decision to make but I think you have the right idea. If it doesn't feel right, you won't be happy and it won't be worth it in the end. I hope you go where your heart tells you to go. You are the only one that can make that decision. Sweet hugs to you, my friend! I'll pray about your situation!
ReplyDeleteIt's not just that. The thing is that I have been doing things I don't really like for a very long time. I did it because I had obligations, kids, family, etc. Now, when kids are grown and (as they put it) can provide for themselves, I can at least try to do what I am passionate about.
DeleteThanks Diane, for your kind comment. :)
What you did took a lot of courage, Marina. The right position will come along.
ReplyDeleteThanks Sheila. At this time I am not even looking for the right position. I let myself go with the flow at this time...
DeleteSometimes, we have to do what we have to do to be happy, even if it involves some changes after changes!
ReplyDeleteThank you Kim. Very nicely said, I love it! :)
DeleteWow...kudos...for following your heart.
ReplyDeleteThis is such a personal story..I am sure it may guide many.:-)
Thank you..
Happiness to you.
Marina, you are so brave. I really admire you for choosing happiness and thank you for sharing this obviously tough time in your life with us. You wrote with wonderful honesty xxx
ReplyDeleteThank you Lorraine. I don't know if was brave or just desperate time for a change.
DeleteI am glad you were able to follow you feeling and change your mind, your path. It is not such an easy thing to do. It also sounds like your children are very wise and grown up - perhaps they have learned a thing or two from you. :-)
ReplyDeleteThank you! I think I had a feeling for quite some time, just didn't recognize what it was and why.
Deletehugs and proud of you for following your heart your kids love their mum
ReplyDeleteThanks Rebecca! I hope they do! :)
Deletehappy for you.. followed your heart :).. god bless!
ReplyDeleteThank you Rasi.
DeleteDear Marina, this is a very brave and good decision. The most difficult to take. Thank you for sharing this personal post with all of us. I am at a crucial moment of my professional life too and I find very difficult to see where I am going. Ciao and good luck!
ReplyDeleteHi Rita, I've had those feelings for quite some time, but didn't know what they were. I didn't go deep inside to search because I had family to feed, and my main goal was "to provide". Everything else was beyond my emotional "reach" and I was not very happy.
DeleteThank you for your comment and your kind wishes! :) Good luck to you too.
This is a good message. You're done. Fine words Marilyn. As they say in Russia: "All that is not done, all the better."...
ReplyDeleteLenusik ♥ ♥ ♥ With love ♥ ♥ ♥
Velvetrose
Thank you for your kind words, Lenusik! :)
DeleteYou have a very expressive and lovely story my friend, thank you for sharing your bravery :D
ReplyDeleteCheers
Choc Chip Uru
Thanks Uru. You made look like a hero in your comment... :)
DeleteGood for you! Glad you did what feels right for you!
ReplyDeleteThanks Della!
DeleteThere is a lesson in your story, Marina, for many people today. I, too, struggled with a work decision, listened to my heart and left behind a good job that was no longer a good fit for me. Wishing you all the best.
ReplyDeleteThanks Jean! I think that having a job that no longer feels right for you is like wearing a very tight shoes: there is a breaking point when it's better to walk with your bare feet...
DeleteMarina - this post and what you went through is profound on so many levels. So happy that you are back in a comfortable place of inner peace and that you didn't allow yourself to just 'press on' with a situation that was clearly going to eat you alive. I have been there; making a decision and then having to un-decide it. And big ones - like buying a house in Phoenix, moving there, and 2 weeks after closing on it - hating it. And moving back to San Diego within 9 mos. They were the longest 9 mos of my life. I have been there - and good for you that you are back so soon!
ReplyDeleteHi Averie, you are absolutely right about the situation. The reason I made such quick decision was simply because of housing, believe it or not. If I didn't have to sign a six months lease, I most likely would be still there, really "pressed on" ... I am glad it happened the way it happened. Last night I read an interesting phrase: "Only you can make yourself happy,... and it's never too late to find out how to do it" (Not Becoming My Mother, Ruth Reichl) Powerful words, and we do need this to be often reminded indeed.
DeleteHi Marina - it takes a lot of courage to do something like that. When one is very young with no family or responsibilities one can afford to be a lot more relaxed about such things so I can understand why you felt so upset. You have to try and do what you can to make yours happy in life - you only get one shot after all! :)
ReplyDeleteHi Charles, oh I know what you mean. I've been in those responsibilities shoes for so-so many years: kids growing up, husband going to school, etc. We had periods of time when I was the only provider for the family, and I was scared even to think about changes , or about what I want or how I feel. It wasn't easy this time, but as you said "we only get one shot after all!" Thanks!
DeleteOh Marina, I'm sorry you had to go through that, but I think you made the best decision. And kudos to you for raising such smart kids!! Sometimes I think things like that are easier for them to see, when we just complicate matters. Hugs!!
ReplyDeleteThank you Jane. Yes, kids surprised me with their wisdom. When did they grow up, I wonder...
DeleteWhat wonderful and sensible kids you have! I am sure everything will work out for you and your family. Good luck and all the best.
ReplyDeleteThank you Norma. Kids never stop surprise us, do they?!
DeleteWhat a remarkable story and one we could all take guidance from. I'm sorry you went through so much to get to a point where you could listen to that inner voice that always knows the right answer. Thanks heaps for sharing your experience and best of luck with whatever comes your way.
ReplyDeleteMaureen, sometimes we have to go all the way to understand that we made a mistake: that's a lesson I've learned. As I said to one of my friends, to understand it was a mistake, I had to make it. Thanks for your comment!
DeleteYes, you certainly did make the right decision, Marina. Simply put, you could not have worked there. And just look at how caring and supportive your family is! You were brave to leave that job and again to come here and write about it. Thank you for sharing, for we can all learn something from your experience.
ReplyDeleteHi John, that experience brought me closer to my kids indeed. And what a wise people they become! I was teaching them, and didn't expect them to tech me. And they did teach me a lesson here!
DeleteCongrats Marina for such a brave decision. I am soooo proud of you :-D And I also think that you're the lucky one having such a supportive family. All the best Marina :-)
ReplyDeleteThank you Joanna. It was not an easy one, you know. But I am sure glad I did.
DeleteI know Marina, such decision are never easy, I know something about that, but it is worth trusting your insticts :-D
DeleteSometimes the best decisions are the hardest, but when we make them they feel so good! Good on you for doing this! Ultimately you will be happier and you deserve that!
ReplyDeleteThank you Jess. That is absolutely right, it was hard, really hard, but I have no regrets. And as long as I don't feel guilty about it, it feels good. :)
DeleteMarina, I know what I you talking about. I used to work in office for 7 years, then I was at home with my kids and family, and I know I wouldn't be happy if I go back. My husband love me at home and my kids also. You are strong women, you made good decision! Some people work all life, the are doing something they don't like , and at the end what you have? Regrets! Please, enjoy your life and your family and everything you can. Do what you love and you see many open doors! Good luck to you my dear friend!
ReplyDeleteYou know, I am learning actually how to be a full time mother, although my kids are grown up... I wish I made such decision earlier, to spend more time with them. Thank you for your support and warm wishes! :)
DeleteGood for you to select with will make you happy and that your family is behind you no matter your choice.
ReplyDeleteThanks Karen! I am blessed to be around such a supportive family and friends.
DeleteYou have a wonderful family...such a great support system! I'm glad you mad the decision that was right for you!!
ReplyDeleteThank you Lizzy. It didn't take me longer than almost a decade...:)
DeleteAwe honey I am so sorry you went through this. And so happy your kids helped out. I had one of these moments on our vacation. It continued when I got home. I think sometimes the body just has to tell you something is wrong. You are a strong woman with an amazing family. I bet they are super proud of you. xx
ReplyDeleteI agree Kim, and we need to listen to our body, our inner self more often.
DeleteWhat an experience. So sorry you had to go through that, but what great kids you have! So glad you decided to follow your heart. Work becomes drudgery if you're not happy doing it. Sounds to me like you made absolutely the right decision. Congrats!
ReplyDeleteThanks John. I have learned from all of this how to pay attention to how I feel.
DeleteMarina, I am so glad you listened to your heart and got yourself out of what would probably become an unhappy working situation! Things will line up and remember MM's good advice! Take care.
ReplyDeleteThank you Pam. If I stayed I would be on strong pills by now, I think. Forcing yourself into things that don't feel right is withdrawing yourself from the joy of life.
DeleteMarina, Most people in this world get road bumps. I relate my life with you, when we came to Canada 12 years ago.My husband went to study upgrade his veterinary education in US and I was with my daughter working, taking care living alone. No relatives.It was so hard to leave my daughter in the day care every day before work. You should be glad that your kids are grown up, at least you do not have to worry about them. Any way, You took the right decision for you and your family.
ReplyDeleteHi Balvinder, oh dear, I do know that road too very well. For many years I didn't even think off how I feel. I just kept going because I had to provide. That is a tough path, and many of us walk it at some point.
DeleteI am glad that you followed your heart...at the end...the only person that you have to answer is to yourself...if you are not happy, no one around you will be. You have a lovely family that support you...I am very happy for you.
ReplyDeleteHave a great week Marina!
Thanks Julianna. And also only you can make yourself happy. To make something happened we need to make an active choice.
DeleteLovely, moving post, Marina. I am sure you have made the right decision. So many of us carry on with lives like robots, without thinking if this is what we want.
ReplyDeleteThank you Sissi. I know, I was one of the robots for so many years, not even allowing myself to think of what I want.
DeleteThanks Jackie. You know you dressed in words my very own thoughts. Although, I didn't talk about it to my children, I cried to them. I think I scared them with my emotions. However, they were the first to tell me to make my own choice, not based on responsibility, ration, but my feelings. I was always an outsider from the herd, adventurous and to some degree fearless person. And look what happened to me? I've forced myself into this rational and responsible person to the point, that even my body couldn't take it anymore. I have no regrets about what I did or didn't do. It was time to make a change, to believe and embrace the new journey.
ReplyDeleteI know the feeling Marina and I know the relief after making the right decision for you! I've been there and made such decisions. Your son being still a kid and not an adult trying to do "what's right" gave you a very clear perspective. Life indeed is too short and if we have the luxury to decide things that will make us happy then by all means we should go ahead and do them. I so happy for you and I am sure now that you passed through this you will keep going in this happy road!
ReplyDeleteThank you Katerina for such wonderful comment. It was an amazing to discover what my kids have become and how quick! One day you see your kids playing in the sand, and the next day they are grown and give you a very mature advise. That was the most powerful moment for me.
Delete